Aug 2010 12

speedy swedeWith the sound of a 571hp Mercedes Benz SLS AMG going 180mph in a 75mph zone.  Ok, so it was not Austria, but a Swiss motorway.  And because this playboy is uber-rich, he’s looking at the maximum fine- $1.08M Swiss francs.  And the exchange rate is not *that* favorable- just over $1M USD in cold, hard (tear-soaked) cash.  Or a black Amex.  Traffic fines are based on severity of offense and your income in both Switzerland and Finland.  In all fairness, if I paid a couple hundred G’s for a car, I’d want to test it’s top speed (197mph claim) as well.  Come on- gun it!  That cop car looks to be a Volvo XC60 (turbo base 300hp with 130mph top speed), and we all know a greyhound will outrun a bassett hound anyday.  At 180mph, he could have been over the German border in 20 minutes!  And (besides 130kph “suggested” maximum speeds), there is no limit to wide open throttle on the Autobahn!  Of course, at that speed you’re probably siphoning the gas tank faster than an alcoholic at last call.

Aug 2010 23

outsideinsideSome baseball parks fans visit for the team (go Padres!), some for the Dodger dogs (duh) or Dogfish Head (Citizens Bank), and some for their history: Wrigley Field, Yankees Stadium (new and old), and Fenway.  While in Boston last week for work, I finally got a chance to visit home to the Red Sox Nation.  Holy crap- Red Sox gear from head to toe, hats to shirts, and if my X-ray glasses weren’t broken, I’m sure I’d be eyeing some Sox boxers (Soxers?) catching balls as well…  The Angels were in town and while Boston came out swinging early, they fell behind and were down 5-4 through 6 innings.  But the Sox have had the Angels number for some time and Boston came out ahead 7-5, winning their 9th straight against LAA.  BTW, the next night they lost…


Bionic Leg
Aug 2010 30

IMG_1210Verdict on my knee is in- no splice and dice right now, but two torn ligaments: MCL and MPFL.  The last ligament tear the doc called “unusual.”  Instead of surgery, I’m outfitted with the knee equivalent of a 1950’s scoliosis brace.  It covers from my ankle to mid-thigh with a NASA-like control system.  Call me a trendsetter- Spring shows will show emaciated models able to walk the runway with the help of this baby!  This is the kind of brace that elicits pitying glances from bystanders and sends children hiding behind their mothers’ legs.

Better yet- my “normal” MRI 4 years ago showed a torn MCL then too.  I probably could have been wearing stilettos 10 years ago.  Those are great for heel-toe technique right?

Kids- don’t grow up to be athletes.  My worst beer injury has been taken care of with a high carb breakfast and a few ibuprofens.

Sep 2010 02

How about the ball, Padres?  Try swinging the stick at the ball!!!  A week ago you won your 76th game, a number sometimes not reached in a full baseball season.  Fast forward 7 days and that 76 wins is still up there, taunting Pads fans in a “knew they couldn’t pull it off” sort of way.

Ponder this: To Slide (into home) or To Slide (downward spiral); which one is more effective at winning?  Split the ball ’til the seams pass the wall!  August is over- forget inflated ERA’s and low OPS and other BS.  Bring us back the freaking Commissioners Trophy for once.  Other low salaried teams have come out of left field to pull it off- you’re up.

Sep 2010 29

In my shopping cart:


Red onion


Garlic bulbs



I joked with the cashier, “bet you can’t guess what I’m making” and she replied “Um…” 

Really???  Pancakes, what do you think?  [eye roll] Yum, avocados and garlic pancakes, come on now!!!

Seriously, don’t quit your day job… Yes, good beer will accompany this guacamole!

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